Big sisters in training.

I wonder how Allison will do being a big sister and not the baby anymore. She's the super jealous one - I can barely give Ella a second of my time before she's running up to me screaming "my turn! my turn!".

Hopefully she'll grow out of it in another 8 months. While I love all my children, the new baby is going to need some attention!

Worth a thousand words ...

The absent parent.

I have been the absent mommy from my girls for almost 2 weeks.

As I was gathering up some fallen clothes from the hamper, I looked in and realized I didn't remember them wearing any of these clothes. In all honesty, I've only seen my girls for about a day in two weeks.

Ugh.

I spent a fabulous weekend with them 2 weeks ago and then we had spent a lot of time coloring, etc after my Embryo Transfer last Monday. I was on bed rest and I was ooo-ing and aww-ing over the glassy picture of my 4 beautiful embryos. I showed Ella and told her they were "baby eggs" and we were trying to grow them. But, as all seeds (or eggs in this case), they don't always grow. I told her that we hope they will, but there is a good chance they won't grow at all.

She told ~everyone~ mommy had 4 baby eggs and wants a sister and a brother. She asked which of the eggs were boys and which were girls. She hoped their were both. Every time she mentioned them, I warned that they probably won't grow, but we're hoping they do.

I had to tell her this morning that all the baby eggs did not grow.

She looked at me and thought about it and said "okay" with a look of sorrow on her face.

And that was my time with her today. And off to work I went. After the ET, I had to fly to Boston. I came back late Saturday afternoon, had Mother's day with the girls and then half way through, I had to work again. Then, I've been at the office for 14-16 hours a day and see them for 5 minutes in the mornings.

This all sucks.

Daycare teacher is an Angel.

I love the teachers at the girls' daycare. They've always gone above and beyond the care of the girls and this is case in point.

Allison's teacher sent me two picture mails yesterday of Allison, since she knew I was out of town and missed the girls. How awesome is that?

This first one is of my missy sleeping. Babydoll in her arms, thin blanket on her head.

And awhile later, I got the "I'm awake now!" picture:

What a goof. And I can not wait for Allie's hair to grow a bit longer! I don't want the girls to have bangs. I want them to have their hair long and all one length. (like Ella's hair is now). Problem is, my children's hair grow at the slowest rate ever for a human being. I usually put little clips in her hair now, but I'm obviously not there. She almost looks like she has a mullet!

Anywho, I miss my babies.

Mommy misses her beans.

I'm currently in Boston on a business trip. Before I go, I think of how wonderful it is going to be to sleep 1) alone, 2) all night, 3) without having to keep an ear open for a child's cry (although I still don't sleep as soundly as I could) and 4) until I have to wake up and not a moment longer.

But then I get there and realize just how easy it is to go into "full missing them" mode. Argh! I just want to hug and kiss them.

It feels a little different right now because I'm carrying around 4 brand new embryos inside me. I know these little guys may not take, but I do feel a little comfort in knowing that for right now, they are inside me. So maternal.